You have sold your ticket to happiness.
When we are so worried about dying or the pain of dying, the life we are afraid of losing isn’t worth saving.
If someone was begging for help in a life and death situation outside your door, would you try to help them? What if that someone was you? Go out, step outside of your fear, and save what’s worth saving about your life.
Nothing is as scary as self-induced decomposition of your soul. (e.g. The Picture of Dorian Gray)