Like you, I wish that people would just do things without having to be nagged about doing them, but we are a pretty stubborn group in general.
And, I wish that nagging worked, but it doesn’t. It doesn’t work for the nagged or the nagger. Besides insuring busy schedules for therapists and divorce attorneys, it makes both parties miserable and gets, at best, short term, marginal results.
So, we can keep investing in a losing proposition and justifying our behavior…
…or we can get smart and start here:
- Chill! Ultimately, you are in charge of no one except yourself.
- Accept that someone is ignoring you because there is more to the story.
- Resolve to be a listener first.
- After people feel heard, negotiate clear expectations, boundaries, and contingencies.
- Examine yourself. Quit playing the victim.
- Move on and grow up.