On a Slow Train to Better

I had a difficult day today realizing that I am far from being who I thought I was.

It’s sad to read my journal from twenty years ago and or even my blog from five years ago and get a sideways glance of my arrogance through the gaping holes in my self-knowledge.

It’s not that I don’t respect my efforts, it’s just so humbling to recognize the terrain that I have been circling for so many years, over and over again, with minimal progress; lessons I thought were under my belt still surfacing as fresh challenges…like learning to quit worrying about tomorrow, about what people think of me, about why I’m not more successful, about my weight and wrinkles and other peripherals, ad infinitum.

However, I am more comfortable with this truth…which…is not a small thing.

That’s progress.

6 thoughts on “On a Slow Train to Better

  1. I guess in some ways it just shows how you’ve grown as a person? I used to have so little knowledge about my mental illness -it’s only been in recent years that I have equipped myself with ways to learn how to live with it. The same thing goes for blogging -I cringe at my first post now I have a far greater awareness about how to write effectively etc

  2. I know that sentiment only too well.

  3. Trusttheprocess

    This was powerful! I made 2 amends within 30 minutes of reading it!

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