Preventing Your Own Flowering?

On this day, many are excited about their new lives and prospects, while others are disappointed that their lives have not yet become what they envisioned.

Sometimes, the disappointment is only about timing. Wait for it.

At other times, it is about nourishing our own growth.

Nothing flowers without nourishment, yet we often prevent our own flowering by…

  • refusing to sit in the light (to feed our spirit)
  • moving so fast through the motions of living (that our roots can’t go deep into the rich soil of our gifts and calling)
  • running from, and complaining about, the rain (refusing, instead of seeking, discipline, insight, and instruction)
  • blaming others for our bad luck (instead of owning the roots of our problems)

Today, I will patiently tend my own mysterious growth.

Unlimited Access?

I wanted unlimited access to prosperity

And became old and mean

Thinking the difficult search wasn’t fair

Cheated of what I thought

Should be easy


Tired and near blind

I stumbled upon the secret door

Opened only after cursing the other keys

And lifting reverently a solitary one

To be activated by the heavens


There it was. Success only after I wanted

Above all other possible rewards

Depth, insight and understanding.

Now, all worlds

Belong to me

Image result for insight quotes

I wrote this because I’m just beginning to understand the mystery; all of this crazy, unpredictable life is about our growth. Nothing else.

Pain becomes worth it.

Hardship becomes worth it.

Loss becomes worth it.

Only after an unconditional surrender to this mystery.

Feed the Spark

Sometimes when I wake in the morning

It feels as if there is no spark

I wander around in the darkness

Looking for meaning

Stumbling over obstacles to joy

Why am I even here?

Then, if I sit

Long enough to notice it

Always there

Waiting for kindling

I remember that others are looking for it too

And it leaps to attention

And laps up despair

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Are You Talkin’ to Me?

A new client of mine was very uncomfortable with her new management responsibility, getting Migraine headaches every time she had to tell her one direct report what to do.

I asked her, “So, why did your boss want you to manage anyway?”

“Because I’m competent…and sensitive to people.”

“Wow!” I responded. “Do you realize how few bosses have those qualities, and how badly that combination of qualities is needed in the workplace? If you have both, you must lead. The world needs you.”

Today she is a C-level executive in a major global company.

What qualities of yours need to be multiplied for the benefit of others?


(Original Post 2014)

Pardon Me, Have You seen My Sense of Destiny?

Pardon me, have you seen my sense of destiny?
I seemed to have lost it along the way somewhere
Yet, I’ve looked up and down and it isn’t here anywhere
I can’t even remember when or where I had it last
Or any other clue that links the future to my past
I must have lived so long without it that, I’m ashamed to say,
I hardly even noticed it was gone today

Until I read that book

The book that meddled, unauthorized, with my head
Forcing me, irreverently, to unearth the sacred dead
And bow humbly to destiny’s gravitational force
At the unyielding wall of its Holy Source

(I wrote this after Neil Gaiman’s The Ocean at the End of the Lane awakened me to the marvel of everyday life and everyday people.)

Originally posted June, 2017

Seven Steps to Cool

My heroes are this cool.

They live with certainty and power and let the moments, good or bad, flow over them instead of control them.

The only way I can achieve this level of equilibrium is to:

  1. Expect the unexpected and plan for bumps in the road
  2. See, appreciate, love the gifts of this very moment
  3. Don’t take delays or aborted plans personally
  4. Believe I am equal to every obstacle (Bring it on!)
  5. Remember everything is temporary
  6. Honor all living things as I honor myself
  7. Rely on a benevolent Universe for help and support

It Took All These Years

Looking at the deep scar on my knee I was reminded that I had never thanked my mother for all the time and money she spent on hospitals, doctors, dentists, and medications for me.

What else had I taken for granted?

Clothes and beds and food and school.

Family, teachers, and kind strangers.

Electricity, clean water, transportation, and gravity.

I’ll have to make up for this oversight.

This very moment.

For the living and the dead.

Thanks, Mom.

I Can’t Believe That!

Don’t believe everything you think.

Even if you have been thinking it for a long time.

Especially if you have been thinking it for a long time.

Ever run into a brick wall trying to reason with someone? So frickin’ frustrating!

Ever notice that sometimes you are the brick wall? Especially when someone dares to have a contrary opinion to yours?

It’s taken a while, but I am learning to say, “Tell me more about that,” or “That’s interesting” before I start my reBUTtle.

Consequently, I have found out I am wrong more often than I thought; improving, only because I was willing to peek over the brick wall and discover an overestimation of my own infallibility.

(Original post Nov 2015)

Judge by Appearance and Get It Wrong

Here’s the safe route:

Always assume people are no less or no more…

  • complicated
  • valuable
  • talented
  • intelligent
  • lonely
  • vulnerable
  • confused
  • insightful
  • misunderstood
  • tired
  • powerful
  • passionate
  • important
  • broken

…than you are.

Because we all have broken hearts, or have had, or will have, it is safe to deal with everyone cautiously and with the confidence that stems from awareness and deep authenticity.

Delia Owen’s book, Where the Crawdads Sing is a “judge-not” practicum for these critical skills, reminding that appearance, status, decorum, or possessions can never tell the whole story about anyone.


I Just Love Criticism!

Said no one.

Yet, learning to welcome criticism is a fast-track to happiness.

To avoid anxiety, indigestion, depression, frustration, fits of anger, revenge, and sleepless nights, learn to be friends with criticism. Because…

  • regardless of how right or good we are, others will always misunderstand, disagree, and (inadvertently or purposely) taunt
  • criticism is ubiquitous; an international pastime
  • criticism reveals gaps in our knowledge
  • accepting criticism takes humility and one can’t get enough of that

Self-acceptance conquers the pain of criticism.