I pledge allegiance to living stress-free
Remembering worry doesn’t work for me
And neither does angry fretting (unfortunately)
I pledge allegiance to living stress-free
Because controlling people and things
(I don’t control) is the job of Kings
My worry and stress never helped one single soul
Only pulled me deep into a sucking hole
Where there was no benefit for me or anyone
Just an embarrassing waste of adrenalin*
*Some of us, who insist upon worrying, believe, erroneously, that the opposite of worrying is not caring. However, this is not the case. Often, surrendering is the only wise way to effectively care…and much more efficient.
I always wanted to be able to sing like Adele or Aretha Franklin. Since I couldn’t, I decided to bring that passion to whatever tasks life handed me. However small, boring, or seemingly insignificant those tasks were, I would “sing my life” like I meant it.
Living like this has changed my life, made difficult times go by faster, brought me lots of friends, work, and loyalty, and helped me deliver energy and hope where they were sadly lacking (like at boring jobs, committee meetings, or the DMV).
“The antidote to exhaustion is not rest but, rather, wholeheartedness.” – David Whyte
Today I thought about how the Universe sometimes has made behind-the-scenes accommodations, when, for instance, we were worried about being late to a meeting that, unbeknownst to us, was postponed. Or, panicked about missing a flight that was delayed. Or, frantic and frustrated about traffic making us late and others were also detained. Or scared about being late for a doctor’s or dentist appointment and we had to sit in the waiting room for a half-hour anyway.
Important recon. Especially when the stakes are much higher.
Things work out.
When we wake up and find ourselves in the wrong place
When our life gets worse with time instead of better
When peace has alluded us
When we wonder what went wrong
Eventually we must see the connection
Between our choices and our emotions
Our sowing and our reaping
Listen to anyone, for any length of time, talk about their family, their life story, or what they are angry about, and you will discover enough crazy to last a lifetime. It’s not just politicians, our relatives, Isis, or our exes that are screwed up.
The only healthy way to navigate our whacked-out world is to look ourselves square in the eye and admit our part of the absurdity. Even though we have elaborate techniques for burying our own culpability, each of us owns a significant piece of this action. Bashing others for their part doesn’t make you any better. In fact, it makes you look crazier and makes me feel like getting the heck away from you as fast as I can.
I might start wearing these signs around my neck to remind both of us.
Sometimes I complain too much about the difficult things life requires me to do. If I am smart, I will see what others can easily see; I need the re-construction, remodel, and renovation that occurs when I am doing a work of love for others, even if I can’t see a positive outcome.
Acknowledging the mystery of this often prevents me from tearing down valuable work with my own hands.
When I am “out of order” I am literally doing things out of order.
- I try to be happy before I take charge of changing my thoughts
- I try to take charge of my day before securing my personal peace and power
- I try to take on tasks or projects without love and gratitude
- I try to serve my family, neighbors, or friends before making sure I am not just “checking the boxes,” posing, or being self-righteous
- I try to “fix” someone else before fixing myself first
When I insist on doing things my own way, ignoring the natural order of success, maybe I should hang an “out of order” sign around my neck (before someone else does).
All my life, I have irritated introverts by pushing them, overpowering them, interrupting them, and by trying to remake them into extroverts. Please forgive me.
I now realize I needed to give space, rather than judgement.
On the other hand, as an extrovert, I have been misunderstood by introverts to be flirting or showing off when I was just enjoying the energy I receive through being with other people.
I guess all of us need space to be who we are (even when it doesn’t make sense to our opposites) rather than judgement.
When confronted with injustice and tragedy, (which is a frequent event if we keep up with the news)
Do not merely ask, “Who could do such a thing?”
Also ask, “Help me recognize the depth of pain, loneliness, and anger in humans who think of doing such things.”
Do not merely ask, “How could something so terrible have happened?”
Also ask, “How can I be more in touch with the painful, tragic things that are happening in people’s lives all over the world, right now.”
Do not merely ask, “How can I physically protect myself and my family from this evil?”
Also ask, “How can I psychologically shield myself and others from despair and live a courageous life in spite of tragedy?”