Too Much Inexplicable Evidence

There are days.

There are days when I come face to face with the ugly side of life; when my heart asks, “So where is your God now?”

In order to survive, I have to do a quick tour of the inexplicable things that have happened to me over the years: times when…

  • resources have come out of nowhere
  • people were extraordinarily generous
  • pain-relief came in the nick of time
  • I was miraculously rescued from threatening circumstances
  • life was overwhelmingly beautiful

Then, I can relax into what I don’t understand.

I Never Said Thank You

Just today, I noticed the fifty-year-old scar below my knee and, for the first time, realized I had never even thought about thanking my mother for getting me to the hospital and paying the medical bills required to repair my leg after a bicycle accident.

It’s a little late now.

But, it’s not too late to use the lesson. What a reminder of how easy it is to take things for granted when wrapped up in our own drama and life is all about me. (Sorry, Mom. Sorry, friends. Sorry, coworkers. Sorry, other family members. Etc., etc.)

And what a reminder to come down off my high horse when tempted to complain about others acting “entitled.”

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Avoiding Blind Spot Terror

Those of us who have almost had a terrifying collision because we failed to be aware of our blind spot, can understand the total shock or pain of finding out what someone really thinks about us.

It’s radically confusing and bewildering, especially if we have…

  • allowed ourselves to depend too much upon what others think of us
  • expected people to be better than us when it comes to talking behind backs
  • expected people not to be dishonest when they are afraid of hurting someone

Being honest is a challenge for us all…not just our “enemies.” We are smart to admit it rather than let dishonesty be our blind spot.

Finally Finding Relief

  • R Realizing I didn’t need anyone’s permission or approval to be…
  • E Exactly who I am
  • L Letting go of restricting beliefs
  • I Initiating small changes
  • E Exercising faith in myself (as created with and for love)
  • F Focusing on a future of dream fulfillment (instead of complaining and despairing)

Suddenly pain became a remote memory… after years of confusing agony.

How do you spell RELIEF?

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(first posted in 2012)

Appreciate It…Now or Never

We humans have the audacity to look back at photos from the past and swoon with nostalgia after completely underappreciating what we had at the time! I guess that is better than not appreciating it at all…but…

Nostalgia will not recover lost people, opportunities, places, our youth (or the body we had), and we will have missed the gifts that were ours for the taking, if we had only known how lucky we were at the time!

It’s too late to fix my ingratitude for how skinny I was in the past (when I thought I was fat), but, I can change the future by what I do now. When tempted to complain about…

  • a relationship that irritates me,
  • something that isn’t exactly right, or
  • my appearance

I will stop myself in mid-sentence by saying, “Appreciate it!” and give now it’s just respect before it is gone.

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The Destroyer

If you want to find out where everything went wrong

If you want to figure out how all the chaos got started

If you want to discover when the loving stopped

Or the joy vanished

And the easy became hard

If you want to track down the villain in the story

And punish him

Then do it quickly

Track down the fear in your own heart and disown it now

Because it is faster than cancer

And more destructive than the impact and shrapnel from a thousand bombs

It has tutored your ego into malice

And baited your intellect into stupidity

It has sucked your blood until you were the real vampire, the real boogie, the scariest zombie

From the most gruesome nightmare ever dreamed

And it was you all along

You! who gave fear the key

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Hot Temper Coolant

A little late for a revelation, I admit it, but recently, I ran smack into the truth that I was quite an over-reactor when it came to slights and insults. While all this time I thought…

  • I was pretty mature
  • People were wrong when they told me to chill
  • Flying off the handle or collapsing into self-pity were legitimate ways to stand up for myself

Being aware of my hot-buttons and their origin (usually my ego) is quite an effective “coolant,” along with apologizing to offended parties, even though it is excruciatingly humiliating to own my pettiness and insecurities.

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Other Parts of the Story

There is room for misunderstanding in every story, especially if I just have the headline or, even, the who, what, where, when, and how.

It’s still oh so easy to be self-righteous, insensitive, despairing, or harsh in my conclusions, cheating someone out of the benefit of a doubt that I so cherish myself. The stories I tell myself about others, myself, or God often lack the most important element: the element of the mystery inside the story.

Gene McGuire’s new book Unshackled: From Ruin to Redemption is a great reminder of the remarkable mystery hidden in the story. Gene served thirty-five years in prison for a crime he didn’t commit, yet managed to come out with this big smile and a great future. Now, that is mysterious…and worth an investigation into the other parts of the story!

Image result for Unshackled Gene McGuire.

Starting with a New Baseline

Weekend challenge: let go of inaccurate opinions of myself…

Two-Minute Tune-Up

“When a person attains a new, more realistic understanding of who he (or she) is, a quantum jump occurs in our ability to perform, whether in sport, business, or personal relations. We are able to express a new dimension of our self that we have just grown into.” -Timothy Galway

Or we can just keep deceiving ourselves and stay where we are.

All those years of butting heads with my accusers, opponents, and family members (instead of hearing and processing their feedback) just added bricks to the wall of my ego, fear, and self-deception. When the wall came down, I saw the baseline behind the wall and began to make rapid progress.

Previously, I protected an illusion that I called myself.

brene brown

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Labor Day Dissected

When patting ourselves on the back for what we have accomplished “all by ourselves,” it is a great exercise to look down and see who has held us up to see the parade. Besides the obvious Life-Giver, relatives, lovers, and caregivers, we all stand precariously upon the shoulders of…

builders, farmers, engineers, sanitation workers, inventors, miners, truckers, baggage handlers, carpenters, chemists, warehousemen, mathematicians, loggers, philosophers, artists, groundskeepers, teachers, dishwashers, architects, cooks, grocers, scientists, welders, doctors, administrators, technicians, auditors, and janitors.

The greatest star, leader, athlete, or visionary is nothing without the rest.

Image result for we all need each other quotes

Image result for we all need each other quotes

The absolute best Labor Day of all is not dependent upon weather, but, whether we see each other.