Happy People Are Sexy (Encore)

Want to be more appealing to the opposite sex?

  1. Have a generous and sincere smile

  2. Be genuinely interested in others without strings attached

  3. Laugh at yourself

  4. Delight in life

  5. Be responsible but healthily detached from outcomes

  6. Be courageous

Anxiety is the thief of competence.

Self-absorption is the thief of sex-appeal.

Even if you are struggling with depression, a negative self-image, unemployment, health issues, job stress, or family challenges, letting go long enough to get out of your narrow prison and see the wide world out there will bring vast benefits to you and others.

You have what it takes to conquer your challenges.

Surrender your ego and your fear…and watch the world come to you.

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If You Want to Find a Hero

Men complain about their female exes, romantic interests, bosses, and co-workers being the b-word, manipulative, or impossible to please. Women complain about men being selfish, self-centered, and shallow.

If we want to stop repeating the madness and find movie-quality soulmates, partners, or heroes, here are the rules:

  1. Quit assessing people by their outward beauty or body type (when I meet a man whose primary measurement of a woman is how fit, pretty, or built she is, or a woman who obsesses about bald, overweight, or old, I know I am in the presence of the immature and lonely)
  2. Look at all people the same (don’t measure by what they are or do, $$, or possessions)
  3. Forgive everyone (bitter people are not attractive)
  4. Honor your suffering instead of complaining about it (the nicest people in the world are often those who have suffered most)
  5. Give generously (and forget about getting something back)

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I’ll Donate Half of My Liver

Not a pick-up line that the average Joe would use, but it unexpectedly brought great love into the lives of two strangers.

Chris Dempsey said he was in the break room one day when he overheard a guy talking about this woman who needed a liver donor. “I spent four years in the Marine Corps and learned there never to run away from anything. So I just said to myself, ‘Hey, if I can help, I’m going to help.’”

What a response! And what a great reminder of a no-strings-attached generosity that attracts the right people into our lives.

Most of us want two things from a partner: 1) strength and independence, and 2) generosity. Chris Dempsey sure had that nailed.

Want better results with romance? Start here.



Story and photo courtesy of CBS Evening News.

Becoming Charming

“Becoming a charming creature is to be one who is charmed by your own life and the lives of all whom you meet.” – Blair Lewis

Charm is a powerful thing, sometimes misused, but to use it beneficially and to charm the right people into our lives, believing this quote is the only effective starting place.

Breaking it down, it’s merely about delight and appreciation. When we have sincere, agenda-less, (no strings attached) appreciation and delight in someone, they’ll find us difficult to resist. Unfortunately, most of us are too busy sorting our own drama to actually delight in someone else. Once we do, and have unconditionally accepted ourselves, our history, and our circumstances, suddenly we have time and energy to find others charming! Then, Voila! Life changes.



Perfect Imperfection

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I love this quote.

And, it is not just true for women. I love a man who is not trying to be macho, sexy, better than someone else, witty, charming, or any of the things they think may attract women or make them look good.

I much prefer a person comfortable enough in their own skin to see past their own self-absorption (as the Geico Gecko).  It is that quality alone that allows someone to truly see and enjoy the other human beings around them.

Awwww…so attractive.

Solid and True Kindness


I’ve always loved this quote and have long used it as a measure of authenticity and genuine kindness in a person.

(If you are dating online, watch what they do and say to {or about} someone they are not trying to impress.)

Until recently I thought Samuel Johnson was just a really smart guy, prolific writer, and author of the first English language dictionary. He was so much more; blind in one eye, barely able to see out of the other, deaf in one ear, scarred and disfigured from childhood diseases, poor and unrecognized until late in his life, he was a man who became generous by way of pain.

“Samuel Johnson fervently believed in each individual’s mysterious complexity and inherent dignity.”Ralph Waldo Emerson