Sabotaging Our Own Happiness

My husband told me he had only one more email to write, then he would completely focus upon me. I said, “It’s about frick’n time!” to which he responded, “On second thought, I have several more emails to write.”

The exchange was all in jest, but sadly, mimicked a real world saga of disconnect.

How often we lose what we most want by demanding, complaining, sneering, pushing, and/or whining! Then, when we finally get what we want, the joy (connection, relationship, etc.) has been completely squeezed out of it.


The simple formula is to be in the simple place of delight with the person with whom you desire connection. That place is where they first wanted you; that sweet place where you looked at them with gentle eyes.

Are You Afraid of What You Might See?

awareness jung quote

Awakening is much easier said than done.

It is so much easier to look around everywhere else, comparing, criticizing, and condemning others while conveniently imagining that we are better than we really are.

I have actually felt very comfortable in this place, never realizing how precarious my position…until…my life came crashing down into a pathetic heap.

Many times this happened when things didn’t go my way, but other times, by simply catching a un-welcome glimpse of myself from someone else’s point of view.

Being mercilessly knocked right off my pedestal is not a nice experience, yet, fortunately, the resulting painful disorientation has led to undeniable (and extremely useful) self-knowledge.

get lost

Fast, Free Face Lifts!

good thoughts

Take it from Roald Dahl, the creator of Willy Wonka, Charlie, and chocolate factories.

The problem is that most of us aren’t aware that the bulk of our thoughts are not bright and what those “dull” thoughts are doing to our faces.

This is so embarrassing but look at the difference this quick face-lift made for me. Which face do you want?

frown facesmiling face


Things We Don’t Notice

I just noticed last week that I love the color of green traffic lights. I have looked at them over a million times and never seen them. This sudden awareness made me think about how unaware I can be of my own blindness.

Concerning our lack of awareness, Seneca the Younger said, “The worse a person is, the less he feels it,” implying the critical role thoughtful examination plays in the development of noble character.

When I have been the most brutal with others and done things I regret, it has always been in conjunction with my lack of disciplined reflection.

Much more than color-blindness is at stake.


If You Want an Easier Day…

If you want to have an easier day, an easier week, an easier August, an easier year…quit complaining and…

Expect trouble.

Expect uncertainty.

Expect challenge.

Expect an adventure that tries your faith, strength, and endurance.

Expect to use all that you have with nothing left over.

Expect the exhilarating joy of survival against the odds.

It may not be free, but this ride is worth the price you’ll pay.

It’s a customized ride that showcases your glow in the fire.

You will scream, “My God, why have you forsaken me?”

In the best company.

And the gilded answer will astound you.

(This is a repost from last year…but I thought it might be worth a repeat! It was for me!) Have a great day!

What I Don’t Have and What I Do Have

I can’t sing. I can’t fly. I can’t do an Olympic sport (well). But I have words.

I am not powerless. I can use my words to…

  • tell myself the truth when I am being pushed around by lies
  • shout out for help from a Universe full of guides and mentors
  • release my anxiety and pain onto a page
  • speak with passion and purpose for those who need hope

I am not powerless.

When I feel afraid, mediocre, overlooked in the “asset department,” or impotent, I can remember what I do have…and use it.


I am what I am and have what I have for a reason. We are what we are and have what we have for a reason. What do you have?

Off the Wheel and on to the Magic Carpet

Courtesy of my friend, Lauren Barrett, I now have a visualization of “where” to step successfully “off the hamster wheel.”

It has to do with lightening up about myself (without doing drugs with Steppenwolf).

If I hadn’t just experienced it this week, I’d be hesitant to say it could be done. I picked up an old book by Catherine Ponder: The Dynamic Laws of Prosperity (instead of just staring at the screen or the wall). Her instructions about changing what I say to myself and substituting powerful affirmations revealed the anchors I had locked around my own ankles. (No wonder I couldn’t get out of the wheel and onto the magic carpet!)

Immediately, I rose above my “problems.” What had I been thinking? Why was I waiting for something to set me free? I had the magic carpet already.

levitation definition:

To levitate is to float in the air, defying gravity.  Levitate comes from the Latin levis, meaning “light.” Something that is light can levitate easily.

And now for a little levity.

levitation joke

Are You a Stiff?

A daily, simple stretching routine transforms my stiff back and tight legs into free, painless agents for working and playing. It still amazes me how quickly I go from slowly creaking around to quick, carefree maneuvering.

Same is true about my spirit.

I might wake up feeling down, pathetic, wimpy, troubled, or disappointed. After, a simple “stretching routine” of reading, meditation, prayer, gratitude, and/or affirmations, wow! I am suddenly a spiritual track star, leaping over obstacles in a single bound. It is really hard to explain the transformation.

all in your head

Got a routine for relief?
Get out of your head…that’s where the excuses live.
Enlighten yourself.

Seeing the Other Side

I thought I was communicating. Everyone else thought I was just talking.

You thought you were confident. They thought you were arrogant.

I thought I was being flexible. He thought I was indecisive.

You thought it was humility. She thought you were weak.

I thought I was showing self-respect.  They thought it was annoying self-pity.

He thought it was candor. You thought it was painful criticism.

She thought it was cooperation. He saw it as compromise.

She thought she was helping. You thought she was interfering.

You thought it was love. She thought it was co-dependency.

By failing to define the fine line between these character traits, we invariably put our relationships, career, happiness, and productivity at risk.

Only the wise 


the other side.

Chronically Confounded

I have spent most of my conscious adult life wondering what to do, what I should have done, what my next step should be, why I am not richer, skinnier, smarter, happier, and stronger, and if I can ever get better, do better, or stay better, ad infinitum.

It’s like I have my own personal, diabolically magnetic hamster wheel that is inescapable and hypnotic…unless…I just…stop and get off.

Every day.

Escaping the pull of the wheel (for me) works like this:

  1. Oops, I’m on the wheel again. Gee, how did I get here?
  2. Oh, now I remember. Step off quickly. It never gets me anywhere.
  3. Meditate. Saturate my mind with what does work:
    • Gratitude
    • Affirming my worth
    • Bite-size action steps
    • Modeling the bravery of my heroes