Getting out of my self-made hell starts with
A no to indulging hurt feelings
A no to putting incidents on repeat
in my head and in my words to others
A no to letting temporary pain block out
Beauty waiting to find me
Love waiting to flow through me
Peace and clarity waiting to fill the hole
That deception continues to dig–
A black hole that sucks all that is good out of me
And turns it into bitter and sour revenge.
A book by Brant Hansen.
The only month that is also a command.
And if we don’t know where to march, this Mother Teresa quote is a timely directional sign.
Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love.
On your mark. Get set. Go!
Follow the leaders who have made the most difference with love.
I am, I said, to no one there. And no one heard at all. Not even the chair.
These lyrics by Neil Diamond sadly describe how loneliness feels to many of us;
So seeped in sadness, that we can’t imagine ever being anything else but alone.
Yet, hope waits just around the corner if we will wait for it.
Keep singing. Keep doing the right thing.
“You could have had…”
The words frowned defiantly
Standing around against my head
“Stop the noise,”
Consciousness faintly said,
Then louder, “Get out of bed.
You have the key to heaven.
Get out of bed!”
Unmet Expectations.
Being left out.
Or the inability to meet others’ expectations.
Accentuated by the emphasis of holiday media hype.
All leading to…
Cynicism.
Yet, who can argue with the reality of this Robert Frost quote? Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired. You’ve felt it. I’ve felt it. It’s a human thing.
But there is a solution.
Make this day, like any day, about giving; about one more opportunity to help another feel seen and appreciated.
So forget about what we want or may need and just be someone who is intent on improving the experience of others.
After all, Saint Valentine gave his life for love.
https://www.bing.com/search?FORM=ARPSEC&PC=ARPL&PTAG=250232255&q=saint%20valentine%20wikipedia
My most important moments in life have not been about love or success or pleasure.
That surprised me.
My most important moments have been about getting better.
The day I decided to look over an offense without getting my feelings hurt.
The first time I listened to criticism without arguing.
The first time I chose a perspective outside my own interests.
The day I decided to give up something important for someone else.
The moment I decided not to complain or curse but to thank God for my suffering.
The first time I stopped my own downward spiral by admitting my failure instead of justifying it.
The first time I pushed through pain by believing I had been given the power to do so.
The first time I recognized the work of angels around me and I fell humbled onto the holy ground.
I met him today
The over-promiser
the impulsive, unreliable, unsure
Peter
who seemed to have loved so deeply and lost everything
buried
in shame and regret
The man who was beaten
and sang afterward
who was in prison and then out
miraculously
I met that once reluctant and disappointed leader
the young man and the old
the tired and the esctatic
receiver of visions of clear direction
and followers who had lost theirs
I met the real Peter
not the man on a stain glass window
nor the religious hero on a one-dimensional page
No, never that one.
The one who was like me.
People who are “weighty,” who have gravitas, own their real and use all of it.
There are those who spend their lives mourning the lack of companionship or advocacy and the unfairness of their situation. Sometimes the situation is complicated. Sometimes the fix is simple:
If no one has done any kindnesses for you, go do for others something you would want done for yourself.
If I want to be where “love is not a small word,” (borrowing the Neil Diamond lyric from Solitary Man), I will need to bring the love that is not a small word…no strings attached, no duplicity, no self-centered focus, no obsession with myself.
Love is not a small word when I lay aside my ego and look at the world through lenses other than my own.
When I feel empty and stuck, fixing it often involves giving up what I think I must have.
“Unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone. But if it dies, it bears much fruit.”
Love waits for us, wherever we are, when we are ready to learn big love with humility.
I am weak and you are strong
I move fast and things go wrong
With callous words or a careless heart
I forget your love, the important part
Then end up empty, back on my knees
To begin again. Help me please.
I’ve discovered it the hard way; if I start the day (or the new year) without the humility and the curiosity to question myself and ask for wisdom, it will be a false start–and not without casualties.
